11 days ago
I entered this world a month too early, with my weight being similar to that of a bag of sugar. They told my parents my survival was unlikely. 30 healthy years later, the FAQ being “don’t you feel old now?”, inspired me to write:
So, while I have joked about joining a support group for 30+, I generally have an “age is just a number” mindset. Might have to thank my parents for it, as my mom is looking great as ever, and my dad parties more than I do (no joke!). In reflection, I think I really needed my 20s to figure out things...life in general (since we don’t get taught much of those skills in school), but also myself (the complexity of my own being). What exactly do I (or do I not) enjoy, love, value, cherish, desire. How do I carry myself; What I’m willing to fight for, what drives me, how do I deal, where do I draw lines, what do I prioritize etc. Refining norms and values; what do I stand for. Too often adverse to the status quo in my case, which took me a lot of time to understand to be ok. Acknowledgement of my flaws, how can I improve: Learning, shaping, shedding, growing, evolving.
While many, if not all of this will continue throughout life, I think a lot of the base is set in your 20s. One of the most valuable lessons I take with me into my 30s is that whatever conclusion comes out of figuring out the above...it’s all good!! There is no right or wrong (unless you killed someone lol), only room for learning and improvement. It’s all about your mindset and attitude.
I finally have the absolute confidence to own it all, own me and the multi-faceted person I am. Still don’t know what the hell I’m doing most of the time, but mannn would I have liked to have known all I do now when I was 20!”You’re allowed to be both a masterpiece and a work in progress, simultaneously”. Also, how boring would it be if we had it all figured out today?
With age comes experience, with experience comes wisdom (IF you pay attention); with wisdom your perspective broadens and life gets so much more interesting.
So...do I feel old? Nope. I feel wiser, confident, grateful and excited! Looking forward to unraveling and refining more as we go towards 40 and onwards...✨